Subjective vs. Objective

I've been having a bit of a time of it thinking of how to break this silent phase. So many thoughts, and all of them are challenging to express in words. I guess sometimes it's just best to write what comes to you in the moment. Beware: extensive navel-gazing ahead!

This summer has provided many opportunities for forging a little further down the path of "Adult Development." Sounds like a pretty clinical term, doesn't it? With many challenges on the home front and a busy schedule, trying to get ready for the coming school year at home and in the coop, I have found myself looking increasingly at the distinction between subjective and objective experience. At first this sounds fairly straight forward. In my understanding, when you are looking at life through a subjective lense, it's all about you. When I think subjectively, I think about my needs, my problems, what and whom I like, what I don't like, who is with me, who is not pulling their weight etc. When using an objective approach, I'm more likely to think about how things work for the family or the group. What do my children need from me? How can I support their growth? How can I support mine?

But as the piggy said, there is always the muddy muddy middle of the puddle, and that where it gets a bit tricky. Because as I'm learning from personal experience, it is very hard to be truly objective. Objectivity implies an absence of judgement, but it can be quite tricky realizing when I am judging. I may be thinking (smugly) that I know what the needs of my family are, only to find out that I was really imposing my subjective opinion on the rest of the gang, rather than doing the kind of detailed observation needed to get to a truly objective, judgement-free understanding. Or, I was thinking that I'd done my observations, but I missed a major piece.

So my lessons for this week are these: First, make sure that you do your meditation and centering exercises every day, as they help clear the head. Second, focus less on educating others about the objective/subjective split, and be the change you want to be. Third, retain boundaries; do not spill your subjective sludge (no matter how well intentioned) all over the feet or others, and make sure you don't let them spill theirs all over your feet either. If needed, wear rainboots.

The Adult work in Waldorf education is very, very challenging for me. But as I am looking ahead to next week and the beginning of our school work, I feel quite good to be on this path of learning. I feel more prepared to try and meet the ever changing needs of my children, and more confident that this path is helping provide me with the flexibility to change course without getting off track in our learning.